social awkwardness.

i find compassion in my heart.

there is a woman sitting approximately 8 feet away from me right now. it is painfully obvious that she is homeless and most likely suffering from some sort of mental illness. she is talking to herself. not about anything in particular and probably nothing too terribly important. she asked another woman for a ride to a church. she asked still another for the time.

she has yet to ask me anything.

part of me is thankful for that. and part of me wishes she would. not that i would know what to do in that moment. i usually stumble over all my words anyway. but maybe, just maybe, if she would have asked me the time i could have loved her. even for that one moment. maybe i could have listened to one of the thousands of stories she probably has to tell. maybe i could have given her a ride if she had asked. in fact, i probably would have. is that even safe? or wise? i dont know. my dad would say most definitely not. “not everyone is your friend!” he would say. and i agree. they arent. but does this woman have any friends? does she have a family? she has to have a mom and dad. or she did at one point.

i find my heart breaking for her. and i also find that most of society would label her as an outsider. as unclean. as “the least of these”. and the more i think about it, i am not that different than her. i once was homeless. i once was fatherless. i was desperately sick and need of healing. in fact, outside the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ, i AM her. and just like me, she is loved by the creator of the universe. she is deeply loved by the God who created the mind that is betraying her. she is cherished by the King. so my prayer is that she would see it. that He would open her eyes to the greatness that He is. who knows…i may meet her again and rejoice alongside her and praise our great God. and it wont be awkward.

so here’s to awkwardness. may it push us to the feet of the King. may it cause us to live boldly and unashamedly. may it show us that we arent that different from each other after all.

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